January 2026

It's the new year but I'm still the same

Ruth Asawa making wire sculptures in 1954.

January felt fast this year, which is a rare feeling for me! Usually it lasts forever. As I get older, the way time passes becomes more and more convoluted. Trying not to think about it so much. I read three great books, listened to a ton of music, watched a few life changing movies… A great media month I would say.

Safe Inside by Lois Hannah (@quiltedcoffin)

My playlist for 2026 if you’re so inclined to follow it. Added some of my current favorites.

A Woman Under the Influence (1974) by John Cassavetes

1. Down by Law (1996) - Jim Jarmusch (4.5)
   All three of the leads were so awesome, the music was amazing, and the black and white looked so good.

2. The Chronology of Water (2026) - Kristin Stewart (3.5)
   Stewart’s directorial debut and I was impressed that she wasn’t afraid to really go there in terms of experimental filming and storytelling, but some of the scenes really didn’t work for me and I’m not sure the writing did either. I did think the acting was great and she definitely had a vision, I’m interested to see what she directs next!

3. Maborosi (1995) - Hirokazu Kore-eda (3.5)
   There is a beautiful scene of the kids running around the seaside, playing and laughing and it genuinely moved me. But other than that, I felt really disconnected watching this. It looked beautiful though!

Their tiny reflections…

4. A Woman Under the Influence (1974) - John Cassavetes (5)
   I was on the verge of tears for the entire movie, everything about it was genuinely so heartbreaking and I could feel it like a lump in my throat. Nick’s love and commitment to Mabel, his immediate willingness to forgive— he wasn’t a perfect person but he loved her so much through all of her hardships. And Gena Rowlands is a legendary actress. Her face can hold so much emotion at once. This movie put me in such a bad afternoon funk that I had to take a nap immediately after watching.

5. Conversation Piece (1974) - Luchino Visconti (4)
   Lots of good stuff in this movie like the outfits and Burt Lancaster being handsome and conversations about aging and loneliness. This is the 200th movie Milo and I have watched together which definitely feels like some type of relationship milestone.

6. Eating Raoul (1982) - Paul Bartel (3.5)
   Funny and lighthearted watch, some of these jokes aged poorly but overall it was a silly time. Great opening scene.

7. Paying for It (2024) - Sook-Yin Lee (3)
   Felt like a mini series. The Q&A after was so chaotic, I sort of forgot how I felt about the actual movie.

1. The Little Virtues by Natalia Ginzburg (4/5)
   A series of vignettes about her life, describing people, places, relationships, and her vocation as a writer. I especially loved the one about England and the one titled “Her and Him”, but my absolute favorite story was the one titled “Human Relationships”. All of the stories had a sort of melancholy atmospheric tone that I liked a lot. Love of life begets love of life!

2. The Sea, the Sea by Iris Murdoch (5/5)
   I am an Iris Murdoch fan forever, and this one was especially good. I really enjoyed the sporadic descriptions of Charles’ lunch, which typically consisted of tinned fish on toast (a personal favorite). Charles is unlikeable, pretentious, and so much fun to read. I couldn’t help but root for his delusions as I spent more time inside his mind. The relationships portrayed in this book (between him and Hartley and him and James specifically) are nuanced and complicated and heartbreaking, made even more so from the fact that we only get to hear his side of the story. Iris Murdoch writes men better than most male authors; she really understands their insecurities and vulnerabilities and the attitudes they use to mask them. This might be her best book!

3. The Last Wolf/Herman by László Krasznahorkai (4/5)
   The Last Wolf was an extremely affecting novella told in one intentional sentence, about a writer who is hired to write the story of the last wolf in the Extremadura region of Spain. Herman is about an animal trapper who suddenly experiences a change of heart and moral and starts to trap something else entirely.
   Both stories grapple with the complexities of man versus nature and our relationship to animals. I find Krasznahorkai’s writing style challenging and engrossing— easy to read but hard to understand. It has this surreal dreamlike quality, taking me in and out of reality and in and out of the narrator’s interior mind. Always rewarding to read him, can’t wait for more this year.

Danielle Kosan (2025)

In

• Gifts, just because I thought of you

• The Survivor episode of Curb. It’s so effing funny

• Sam, the receptionist at my job, started calling me Cammi bear and it makes me grin every time

• Breakfast casserole

• Getting domestically partnered :3

• Ruth Asawa exhibit at the MOMA

• Big snow storm!

Out

• The NYC sickness finally got me… on the third day of the year…how am I supposed to do my resolutions now…

• Not having hot water in the apartment

• Feeling bad for spending a little money on myself as a treat sometimes

• Asking my bosses if they’re mad at me I should probably stop doing that

• Embarrassment about being online. I chose this life

• I don’t feel ready to start school again but my semester has started so here I go

• January 21st, my worst day in awhile

Le Souvenir Bleu (1982) - Marc Chagall

I’m really into random TikTok accounts that serve a single purpose at the moment, and these are my favorite:

TikTok accounts:

• errands.show
  Each episode follows a person running an errand.

• What’s Troubling You
  Some of them are serious and some are quite funny, my favorite is the interview with the guy who can’t stop playing Sudoku.

• Taste Buds NYC
  These two guys use a random generator to pick a country and then they eat at a restaurant in New York City that serves the country’s food. It’s such a great reminder that I live in such a diverse and eclectic city, and I need to branch outside of the same five restaurants I tend to gravitate to…

Videos:

• Ruth Asawa: documentary on an artist who worked every minute | HOW TO SEE
  I found this not only informative but incredibly touching, especially the way her kids talk about her with so much love and admiration. I can’t help but feel that Ruth Asawa was not only a brilliant artist and activist but also a genuinely kind hearted person. After seeing her exhibit at the MOMA, I was excited to learn more about her and her practice!

Thank you for reading— Love you!